Thanks for your thoughts that have inspired mine. While we think we are here in physical reality, the ego is our way forward. It is the ego that learns; it is the ego that remembers; it is the ego that decides for love. Our experience here in physical reality is the way for the ego to shape itself. It is the way for the ego to find its way out. And so, in that respect, everything that happens is for our good because it is the way that the ego shapes its personality. How we decide to react to anything is yet another aspect of the personality we create.
I studied Seth for nearly 20 years before I found the Course. I find them complementary. Seth explains that every “bad“ thing that seems to happen to us is an opportunity - a planned way - for the personality to shape itself. That shaping, in the physical world, often has to do with form. But the effects of the shaping go beyond the physical form.
Of course, ACIM counsels that all of that shaping, in both the physical and non-physical realms, is illusion. But while we believe we are here, it’s helpful to realize the importance of every experience because of the opportunity it presents, or has presented, to develop the ego - as it is ultimately the ego that will lead us home by its decisions.
Thanks for sharing, Deb . . . absolutely agree on the experiences of life being lessons . . . certainly being present to them that way - the posture of a learner, a friend calls it - makes it easier to be happy and helpful . . . thanks for being here
Sean, I so appreciate the depth of your understanding of the Course. You are a powerful mind and a beloved Child who is entitled to see things differently, because of who you are. Thank you for sharing as you do.
That Child in me recognized his Brother when he read this. Recognized himself in his Brother's heart, shared so openly and innocently here. His own heart broke a little for his Brother's pain and confusion even as he gave thanks for that Brother's open arms and the Light shining through that confusion. We are in this together. Thanks be to God.
Sean, your article was profound and timely as always. It was especially powerful for me, because I got to SEE a deep wound that rules this life. I have missed your Monday morning articles, BUT never once did I think you might be taking a break or going through a dark night of the soul yourself, instead, this ego structure thought that I had been deleted for whatever reason from your email list. I was no longer wanted.
It is very hard for me to admit this, and very embarrassing, but I have too because it is such a deep wound, thinking I am the cause of “everything”, even subtly believing the world is a mess because of me. The belief is “ I am so bad”. This is a huge sense of “separation”. I had not seen it so clearly as I do in this moment and how it premeates every aspect of my life.
You wrote “ The suggestion is, deep down, there is a damaged child in us who doesn’t want to be helped, doesn’t want to be healed. It’s as if he or she has learned that love is supposed to hurt…...because it’s all they know and all they have - has become a treasure they won’t give up. “ You described me.
Thank you Sean for helping me see and acknowledge the hurt that keeps me separate. In this moment I do not feel separate only deeply grateful for your courage to reach out and be of service. Much love 🙏.
Glenda, thank you. This means a lot to me. The journey ego took you on is so familiar - I absolutely identify. When is it not about me?!? Ego is never a reliable narrator. But vulnerability is the cure - being honest is the cure. Thank you for sharing so honestly about that experience, for giving me and others the gift of being seen and heard. We are in this together and you are a treasured companion. Thank you for being here 🙏🙏
Sean, in your absence, I wondered where you wandered to, wandered off to. Did someone give you shelter, a warm bed, some decent food to stave off the starving? Had anyone stopped to look into your eyes and pet your head for even a moment? I missed you, so why didn’t I reach out to check on you, which was honestly my caring impulse. Similar to Glenda, I wondered if I too had been “deleted” from your email list, not wanted or needed. After all, I’m not a devoted student of the course so why not cull the half-hearted. Oh how the mind of the stray does stray.
One gem of the course that brings me back from my wandering ways is that *all that I do I do unto myself* . . .
Teacher Hameed Ali (author A.H. Almaas) echoes this here:
“Your conflicts, all the difficult things, the problematic situations in your life are not chance or haphazard. They are actually yours. They are specifically yours, designed specifically for you by a part of you that loves you more than anything else. The part of you that loves you more than anything else has created roadblocks to lead you to yourself. . . . “Look here! This way!” That part of you loves you so much that it doesn’t want you to lose the chance. It will go to extreme measures to wake you up, it will make you suffer greatly if you don’t listen. What else can it do? That is its purpose.”
Thanks, Sean, for reminding us to stop pretending that suffering is love. I hope we all feel less lost, confused and lonely by giving attention to one another as you have with this essay.
I love the Almaas quote, Susan. Thank you for sharing it.
And thank you for reading and sharing. Your kind words mean a lot.
Honestly, part of the journey right now has to do with writing - a lot of what is going on does not resolve well in words. This happens from time to time (as you know) and it's always an interesting space. Sort of vulnerable and drifty but also exciting.
I agree with Almaas that these are sites of learning - intimate encounters with our self, often at levels we typically don't plumb, hence the unfamiliar struggle with language my go-to tool for plumbing :).
Reading Marianne Sawicki during Advent really up-ended some of my internal anchors. I've been a lot slower following up on her work - reading Fiorenza right now. It's still grounding but in a deeper way that seems to be less about stability and more about preparation/continuing the journey/entering the desert . . .
I don't know. Again, the language I want to lean on isn't there right now.
Anyway - thank you again - it's always good to connect with you - and I hope you're well and that YOUR writing is going well . . .
Just last night as I lie in bed, I had a thought that brought me to tears. I tried to imagine what it would feel like as a child, to have someone stroke my face and tell me everything is going to be OK and that they love me.
Don’t have any memories of that. Have always been a lone wolf feeling like there’s nobody to rely on. I did it to myself, pretending my hand was Jesus’. How beautiful. Then I see this today. Way cool! Thank you for your wonderful work! So grateful!
Thanks Laura . . . I hear this and I appreciate very much both the loneliness and the determination to find a way out, even if we have to do it ourselves . . . thank you for being here. I appreciate the companionship very much, and the reminder that we no longer have to be alone.
I was that innocent, but abused, battered child that stayed scared within, while my outside person grew up and became free of abuse. It does take coaxing and lots of loving and promised security to get to know that inside child. But eventually that inner child does come out more and more and your article reminds me to love my inner child and that it will in turn it will love other inner children. Thanks for your article Sean.
Amen, Robyn. I have always found that language of ACIM interesting - it doesn't dwell on the inner child but the couple places where it does are very refreshing and clear. There is a darkness in us but beyond that is a light that the darkness cannot touch, and the children show it to us. Making it about kids - the inner ones and the outer ones - always helps. Thanks for being here Robyn - I'm very grateful.
Thank you Sean, I found your article moving and uplifting. I have been following the Course and teaching it too for many years. I love the way your lyrical writing connects us through feelings as well as intellect. Many Course teachers emphasise 'learning' but for me the emphasis is on how to live and breathe the teachings in the way we move through each day, knowing we are love and that there is no separation. Embracing our inner child's profound innocence is both essential and empowering.
Yeah, the course sort of invites a scholastic approach but I agree with you - application is really where the game is at. Tara Singh was really helpful to me at a certain juncture in my study and practice - he was very very clear about this and it really helped me to keep my focus on healing - the Wholeness of it - rather than just understanding (which matters, of course, but you know . . . )
Anyway, thank you again for reading and sharing. I'm grateful for the company!
Sean, I could feel tears welling up as I read your post today. My heart opened wide as I felt your pain. I sometimes wonder if I'm going to make it through this period, however long it lasts. But I know that we will! This response is really long. Sorry. I did ask HS if I should send such a long post. I got a thumbs-up! 👍🙏💖
I don't know if you were reaching out for sure, but I hope this helps all who reads it and needs it. This is some of my processes as I muddle through the illusion.
A friend and I have been doing daily gratitudes for the past couple of months (Feb-Mar 2025). This practice helps me to connect and feel some goodness. But over the last week, I realized today, that I had gotten all tied up, preoccupied and worried about foolish things. And gratitude went by the wayside. I can't even say that these things were about the appearance of the state of our world. I've kept my nose out of that turmoil for now. I need to develop particular spiritual habits , spiritual chops, that I had never done well enough before. That has been the message to me from MySelf, lately. Also, I must ask Myself, does it serve me to look (at the news)? (Read Chapter 4 section 6 annotated edition or Chapter 4 section 4 FIP edition. This is about not looking at the darkened glass and redefining for yourself, the ego's scary messages.)
I realized that I was getting fooled by the stories of my ego, again! Dang!
Finally, I had to say, Who cares? This is my illusion. And until I change my mind, I'm going to get more of the same!" I knew that I had to come back full circle. I made a firm and dedicated commitment to see my situations differently. And to recognize each person I encounter as the Light of the world that they are. To pause, take a breath and ask the Holy Spirit to speak for me when I approach a brother (Credit to Lisa's class, below). Allow my heart to open and see that the crazy rantings coming out of a mouth (any mouth) are really a cry for Love. Just as stated in your post.
(I'm taking Lisa Natoli's 40-day free class. She revamped it. It is very good!)
I've also begun again by doing the exercise at the beginning of Chapter 30. In essence, I "will" for today not to make decisions by myself (with the ego as my guide).
NOTE: The word "will" is a very important word. To will something for me is an unequivocal intent.
Continuing: I "will" to attend to any thought system or encounter, by others or my own, with the Holy Spirit by my side.
Steps Chapter 30 actually states this:
"I will make no decisions by myself. If I make no decisions by myself, this is the day that will be given me."
Define your happy day with happy surprises, not determined by you! They will happen, I promise. I had a delightful day a few days ago, before temporarily forgetting to apply this again.
You must follow through with some additional steps, if you have found yourself in a state that is not joyous! ;)
---
Note: We make decisions so quickly that we don't even realize that we had asked and answered a question at almost the same time. The Course also says that we "quickly forget" that we even went through this routine in order to NOT upset the ego's turmoil that we hold on to for dear life.
I think about how quickly some computer routines run. They run practically instantaneously for a quick decision or question. (See lesson 136, para 5)
As a mind, connected to the ego, at the question/answer-decision stage, I have become the Judge, Jury and Executioner, JJE. The Course calls it a double question. And how do I know that I've done that? Ask yourself, "How do I feel?" This is one of the ways I get to use the body as a communication device. If things are flowing; I'm happy; those around me are happy; then, I have the HS as my guide. Otherwise, I have chosen my ego, the devil Beelzebub, Satan, the scary voice, etc.! Yikes!
---
Chapter 30 goes on to say, if you have chosen unwisely, choose again. But you must circumvent the ego's clench on you, that is, your decision/belief. So, continue to go through these steps:
"I have no question." "I forgot what to decide." This cancels out the terms that you have set, and lets the answer show you what the question must have really been.*
"And so I hope I have been wrong."
You would be better off if you were wrong (and happy). You are not coerced, but merely hope to have the thing you want.
Then you can say in perfect honesty, "I want another way to look at this."
"Now you have changed your mind about the day and have remembered what you really want. Its purpose has no longer been obscured by the insane belief you want it for the goal of being right (scary outcome/unhappy) when you are wrong (yay! the Holy Spirit's interpretation."
Go on with:
"Perhaps there is another way to look at this. What can I lose by asking?"
---
*I had a hard time understanding the double question and getting an answer to the question I really want. I thought a decision was a statement not a question. But it really is an answer to a question that you've asked and forgot that you had even asked and answered, i.e. you've made a decision about someone or something.
For example, you see a brother who has a frown on his face because he just got bad news that has nothing to do with you or anyone you know. But your ego has other plans! And so you think, "Why is he looking at me that way?" (You didn't really consciously ask yourself that. Instead, you jumped to a decision about him. As soon as we asked the question, an answer came back. The ego goes right to the JJE.) The following internal dialog, also goes by quickly: "He looks angry, because of that thing that I said or did an instant or millennium years ago," (judge). "But he should have not done that thing he did to me. He's the bad one (jury)! I hate him or myself for it (executioner)." (Now that you've gotten through that routine, you feel guilty, shame, anger, depression.) You've imprisoned both of you with a false perception. And until you quietly and peacefully give it to the H.S. for His Love and forgiveness, both of you will feel the effects. Those questions and conclusions go by imperceptibly most of the time! Our bodies simply get the outcome, the feeling. And the disease unless we ask the HS to fix it.
The Course puts it this way.
"A question (decision) asked in hate (fear) cannot be answered, because it is an answer in itself." This is the double question. (See Chapter 27 section 4 , para 2 and 3 to explain this further).
So, to demonstrate right minded thinking after quickly catching myself, here you go.
Two days ago, I had eaten something that appeared to effect my whole digestive track. Instead of asking a question, "Why or What?" and making a decision in my mind, (for earlier that day I had decided that I was not going to subject myself to the ego's rantings and dismal proclamations about this body's state of being) my thought, ever so briefly, went to my "stomach and intestines". "I'm going to be sick." but then I remembered my earlier decision. So, I quickly went through Chapter 30s' Rules For Decisions. I allowed for a question and answer not of my (or the ego's) making. As I sat at my small dining table, I envisioned Jesus sitting across from me. He had a sky blue tallit (prayer veil) over his head. He reached for my hands, held them, and then reminded me, of the question I really wanted, Who am I? He went on. "This is not who you are. You are the Light of the world. You are not a body. Your body is an illusion just as those sensations (in your digestive track) are." We sat there together as I remembered my real Self. The "sensations" disappeared. I didn’t have to run to the bathroom which is my typical M.O.
I've reached out to Jesus several times since then over the last two days. He sits facing me in meditation or in my studies. As I write this, I just remembered to ask Him to sit next to me. I see Him in my imagination doing so. He's held my hand and calmed my mind as we walked through the dark cloud of illusions** and got myself back to the calm Self, the Self that remembers to "Be at peace and remember that I am God" or "Yea, though I walk through the shadow of death (and illusions), I will fear no evil, for thou art with me; thy rod and staff they comfort (guide and protect) me."
When I envision Him with me, it brings a genuine smile to my heart and face.
**Lesson 70
"Try to pass the clouds by whatever means appeals to you. If it helps you, think of me (Jesus) holding your hand and leading you. And I assure you this will be no idle fantasy."
OMG. that last line, "no idle fantasy!" Soak on that for a while!
We are a family here at your blog. We've come to this earth at a challenging time. We must remember to reach out to one another when we need a little reassurance. This process, nor living here now, is not for the faint of heart! I've seen much evidence to allow me to realize that I am protected. Perhaps it's because of the job that I must do, helping to establish the atonement. I believe that all earnest seekers at this time are also protected.
• Thank you, Sean! Many blessings and much Love to you. I am here for you, as I feel confident are all who read your posts!💞 You are a blessing to all of us!
Thank you for sharing, Jeannie. I'm very grateful for your clarity and hopefulness. Our shared presence is the way forward - it is the light! And I love hearing folks share their experience and strength, modeling the way forward for those of us still struggling to find the path . . . thank you Jeannie 🙏🙏
Sean, this is so beautifully raw and honest and a part of the confusion of many of us everywhere I suspect. Knowing the illusion and seeing the ego’s belief in separation and studying the Course in order to overcome these worldly concepts are all worthwhile for our learning and movement towards love……but where is the Grace and Love that Jesus is reminding us all resides inside, IS God, IS the Holy Spirit, IS never separate.
How do we see the oneness and beauty in others BEFORE we see it in ourselves? Before we truly convince that child still lurking inside that screams at us daily to be seen?
How do we possibly give authentically in relationships if our sense of self only comes from a place of being this perfect, kind, loving companion, striving to not feel separate because the Course teaches us we’re not?
We know the Truth, we many times feel it and live it but when that child reaches out for attention we so often deny the little one it’s due. Jesus never denied the little ones. He calls us to be like them. And what do children do? They feel their feelings in the moment without judgement or a sense of selfishness. They rightly expect their caregivers to provide for those needs and respond to those feelings.
Now, in this moment, no one else can be our caregiver. No one can make us feel enough because we are kind or loving or supportive. No one can make us feel one with the all. Not the Course, not ancient Texts, not our spouse or children or any relationship. And it’s only when that hell hole of aloneness is explored and the fears of the child inside are allowed to be truly expressed can the real Comforter be revealed. Not the ego’s version….the real Source that never abandoned you or made you feel not enough. That which dwells within every fibre.
Only then can we see that it’s true in all others and hence can’t possibly be separate. But until that realisation happens internally, in this illusionary suit we have been blessed with, we accept that Love is graciously shown through relationships in order to always point the way back to Source and we forgive ourselves with a chuckle that we forget so often.
Sorry Sean! I’m obviously talking to myself and little Lizzie. Sending us all loving pointers 💖
Loving pointers gratefully received, Liz . . . I love all of this and appreciate you sharing it. If we don't share the way with one another, we'll never find it ourselves - and I forget all the time and needs lot of help . . . thank you for being here and being a light 🙏🙏
Thank you for reminding : very insightful. You said ,’ what I truly want from you is friendship as we find our way back to our True Self in Creation only way to receive friendship from you is to give you friendship. There is no other way. ‘ Bill said to Helen- there must be another way- that is the other way- a way of moving away from egoic conflict- offer friendship- offer peace - kindness and receive friendship, peace, kindness. What one gives they receive. Thank you Sean.
"There is no separation anywhere. All that's missing is our acceptance of this fact." This is the clincher. Thank you again for so much inspiration and insight. SO needed right now!
Thank you, Sean. Recognizing, remembering, and reminding one another of our inner child’s innocence and that we are walking together on holy ground makes kindness and companionship possible. In this way, no stray dog or person can ever stay lost for long.💕🌸
Thank you Kimberley . . . Remembering our innocence is so fundamental - and the innocence of those we hold guilty - easier said than done but also surprisingly natural . . . and yes, no more lost dogs or people, just friends walking "the way of innocence together, singing as you behold the open door of Heaven and recognize the home that called to you (T-20.II.11:3) 🙏🙏
Thank you dear brother (where have you been - you have been missed!) There is no separation anywhere. Thank you for reminding me how simple salvation is. "When brothers join in purpose in the world of fear, they stand already at the edge of the real world. ²Perhaps they still look back, and think they see an idol that they want. ³Yet has their path been surely set away from idols toward reality. (ACIM, T-30.V.7:1-3)
Thank you Sean, I found your article moving and uplifting. I have been following the Course and teaching it too for many years. I love the way your lyrical writing connects us through feelings as well as intellect. Many Course teachers emphasise 'learning' but for me the emphasis is on how to live and breathe the teachings in the way we move through each day, knowing we are love and that there is no separation. Embracing our inner child's profound innocence is both essential and empowering.
Thanks for your thoughts that have inspired mine. While we think we are here in physical reality, the ego is our way forward. It is the ego that learns; it is the ego that remembers; it is the ego that decides for love. Our experience here in physical reality is the way for the ego to shape itself. It is the way for the ego to find its way out. And so, in that respect, everything that happens is for our good because it is the way that the ego shapes its personality. How we decide to react to anything is yet another aspect of the personality we create.
I studied Seth for nearly 20 years before I found the Course. I find them complementary. Seth explains that every “bad“ thing that seems to happen to us is an opportunity - a planned way - for the personality to shape itself. That shaping, in the physical world, often has to do with form. But the effects of the shaping go beyond the physical form.
Of course, ACIM counsels that all of that shaping, in both the physical and non-physical realms, is illusion. But while we believe we are here, it’s helpful to realize the importance of every experience because of the opportunity it presents, or has presented, to develop the ego - as it is ultimately the ego that will lead us home by its decisions.
Thanks for sharing, Deb . . . absolutely agree on the experiences of life being lessons . . . certainly being present to them that way - the posture of a learner, a friend calls it - makes it easier to be happy and helpful . . . thanks for being here
Sean, I so appreciate the depth of your understanding of the Course. You are a powerful mind and a beloved Child who is entitled to see things differently, because of who you are. Thank you for sharing as you do.
That Child in me recognized his Brother when he read this. Recognized himself in his Brother's heart, shared so openly and innocently here. His own heart broke a little for his Brother's pain and confusion even as he gave thanks for that Brother's open arms and the Light shining through that confusion. We are in this together. Thanks be to God.
Thank you Dan . . . I'm very grateful 🙏🙏
~ Sean
Sean, your article was profound and timely as always. It was especially powerful for me, because I got to SEE a deep wound that rules this life. I have missed your Monday morning articles, BUT never once did I think you might be taking a break or going through a dark night of the soul yourself, instead, this ego structure thought that I had been deleted for whatever reason from your email list. I was no longer wanted.
It is very hard for me to admit this, and very embarrassing, but I have too because it is such a deep wound, thinking I am the cause of “everything”, even subtly believing the world is a mess because of me. The belief is “ I am so bad”. This is a huge sense of “separation”. I had not seen it so clearly as I do in this moment and how it premeates every aspect of my life.
You wrote “ The suggestion is, deep down, there is a damaged child in us who doesn’t want to be helped, doesn’t want to be healed. It’s as if he or she has learned that love is supposed to hurt…...because it’s all they know and all they have - has become a treasure they won’t give up. “ You described me.
Thank you Sean for helping me see and acknowledge the hurt that keeps me separate. In this moment I do not feel separate only deeply grateful for your courage to reach out and be of service. Much love 🙏.
Glenda, thank you. This means a lot to me. The journey ego took you on is so familiar - I absolutely identify. When is it not about me?!? Ego is never a reliable narrator. But vulnerability is the cure - being honest is the cure. Thank you for sharing so honestly about that experience, for giving me and others the gift of being seen and heard. We are in this together and you are a treasured companion. Thank you for being here 🙏🙏
~ Sean
Thank you Glenda. What you have written is helpful for me.
Sean, in your absence, I wondered where you wandered to, wandered off to. Did someone give you shelter, a warm bed, some decent food to stave off the starving? Had anyone stopped to look into your eyes and pet your head for even a moment? I missed you, so why didn’t I reach out to check on you, which was honestly my caring impulse. Similar to Glenda, I wondered if I too had been “deleted” from your email list, not wanted or needed. After all, I’m not a devoted student of the course so why not cull the half-hearted. Oh how the mind of the stray does stray.
One gem of the course that brings me back from my wandering ways is that *all that I do I do unto myself* . . .
Teacher Hameed Ali (author A.H. Almaas) echoes this here:
“Your conflicts, all the difficult things, the problematic situations in your life are not chance or haphazard. They are actually yours. They are specifically yours, designed specifically for you by a part of you that loves you more than anything else. The part of you that loves you more than anything else has created roadblocks to lead you to yourself. . . . “Look here! This way!” That part of you loves you so much that it doesn’t want you to lose the chance. It will go to extreme measures to wake you up, it will make you suffer greatly if you don’t listen. What else can it do? That is its purpose.”
Thanks, Sean, for reminding us to stop pretending that suffering is love. I hope we all feel less lost, confused and lonely by giving attention to one another as you have with this essay.
Love,
Susan
I love the Almaas quote, Susan. Thank you for sharing it.
And thank you for reading and sharing. Your kind words mean a lot.
Honestly, part of the journey right now has to do with writing - a lot of what is going on does not resolve well in words. This happens from time to time (as you know) and it's always an interesting space. Sort of vulnerable and drifty but also exciting.
I agree with Almaas that these are sites of learning - intimate encounters with our self, often at levels we typically don't plumb, hence the unfamiliar struggle with language my go-to tool for plumbing :).
Reading Marianne Sawicki during Advent really up-ended some of my internal anchors. I've been a lot slower following up on her work - reading Fiorenza right now. It's still grounding but in a deeper way that seems to be less about stability and more about preparation/continuing the journey/entering the desert . . .
I don't know. Again, the language I want to lean on isn't there right now.
Anyway - thank you again - it's always good to connect with you - and I hope you're well and that YOUR writing is going well . . .
~ Sean
Just last night as I lie in bed, I had a thought that brought me to tears. I tried to imagine what it would feel like as a child, to have someone stroke my face and tell me everything is going to be OK and that they love me.
Don’t have any memories of that. Have always been a lone wolf feeling like there’s nobody to rely on. I did it to myself, pretending my hand was Jesus’. How beautiful. Then I see this today. Way cool! Thank you for your wonderful work! So grateful!
Thanks Laura . . . I hear this and I appreciate very much both the loneliness and the determination to find a way out, even if we have to do it ourselves . . . thank you for being here. I appreciate the companionship very much, and the reminder that we no longer have to be alone.
~ Sean
I was that innocent, but abused, battered child that stayed scared within, while my outside person grew up and became free of abuse. It does take coaxing and lots of loving and promised security to get to know that inside child. But eventually that inner child does come out more and more and your article reminds me to love my inner child and that it will in turn it will love other inner children. Thanks for your article Sean.
Amen, Robyn. I have always found that language of ACIM interesting - it doesn't dwell on the inner child but the couple places where it does are very refreshing and clear. There is a darkness in us but beyond that is a light that the darkness cannot touch, and the children show it to us. Making it about kids - the inner ones and the outer ones - always helps. Thanks for being here Robyn - I'm very grateful.
~ Sean
Thank you Sean, I found your article moving and uplifting. I have been following the Course and teaching it too for many years. I love the way your lyrical writing connects us through feelings as well as intellect. Many Course teachers emphasise 'learning' but for me the emphasis is on how to live and breathe the teachings in the way we move through each day, knowing we are love and that there is no separation. Embracing our inner child's profound innocence is both essential and empowering.
Thanks for reading and sharing, Lia.
Yeah, the course sort of invites a scholastic approach but I agree with you - application is really where the game is at. Tara Singh was really helpful to me at a certain juncture in my study and practice - he was very very clear about this and it really helped me to keep my focus on healing - the Wholeness of it - rather than just understanding (which matters, of course, but you know . . . )
Anyway, thank you again for reading and sharing. I'm grateful for the company!
~ Sean
Sean, I could feel tears welling up as I read your post today. My heart opened wide as I felt your pain. I sometimes wonder if I'm going to make it through this period, however long it lasts. But I know that we will! This response is really long. Sorry. I did ask HS if I should send such a long post. I got a thumbs-up! 👍🙏💖
I don't know if you were reaching out for sure, but I hope this helps all who reads it and needs it. This is some of my processes as I muddle through the illusion.
A friend and I have been doing daily gratitudes for the past couple of months (Feb-Mar 2025). This practice helps me to connect and feel some goodness. But over the last week, I realized today, that I had gotten all tied up, preoccupied and worried about foolish things. And gratitude went by the wayside. I can't even say that these things were about the appearance of the state of our world. I've kept my nose out of that turmoil for now. I need to develop particular spiritual habits , spiritual chops, that I had never done well enough before. That has been the message to me from MySelf, lately. Also, I must ask Myself, does it serve me to look (at the news)? (Read Chapter 4 section 6 annotated edition or Chapter 4 section 4 FIP edition. This is about not looking at the darkened glass and redefining for yourself, the ego's scary messages.)
I realized that I was getting fooled by the stories of my ego, again! Dang!
Finally, I had to say, Who cares? This is my illusion. And until I change my mind, I'm going to get more of the same!" I knew that I had to come back full circle. I made a firm and dedicated commitment to see my situations differently. And to recognize each person I encounter as the Light of the world that they are. To pause, take a breath and ask the Holy Spirit to speak for me when I approach a brother (Credit to Lisa's class, below). Allow my heart to open and see that the crazy rantings coming out of a mouth (any mouth) are really a cry for Love. Just as stated in your post.
(I'm taking Lisa Natoli's 40-day free class. She revamped it. It is very good!)
I've also begun again by doing the exercise at the beginning of Chapter 30. In essence, I "will" for today not to make decisions by myself (with the ego as my guide).
NOTE: The word "will" is a very important word. To will something for me is an unequivocal intent.
Continuing: I "will" to attend to any thought system or encounter, by others or my own, with the Holy Spirit by my side.
Steps Chapter 30 actually states this:
"I will make no decisions by myself. If I make no decisions by myself, this is the day that will be given me."
Define your happy day with happy surprises, not determined by you! They will happen, I promise. I had a delightful day a few days ago, before temporarily forgetting to apply this again.
You must follow through with some additional steps, if you have found yourself in a state that is not joyous! ;)
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Note: We make decisions so quickly that we don't even realize that we had asked and answered a question at almost the same time. The Course also says that we "quickly forget" that we even went through this routine in order to NOT upset the ego's turmoil that we hold on to for dear life.
I think about how quickly some computer routines run. They run practically instantaneously for a quick decision or question. (See lesson 136, para 5)
As a mind, connected to the ego, at the question/answer-decision stage, I have become the Judge, Jury and Executioner, JJE. The Course calls it a double question. And how do I know that I've done that? Ask yourself, "How do I feel?" This is one of the ways I get to use the body as a communication device. If things are flowing; I'm happy; those around me are happy; then, I have the HS as my guide. Otherwise, I have chosen my ego, the devil Beelzebub, Satan, the scary voice, etc.! Yikes!
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Chapter 30 goes on to say, if you have chosen unwisely, choose again. But you must circumvent the ego's clench on you, that is, your decision/belief. So, continue to go through these steps:
"I have no question." "I forgot what to decide." This cancels out the terms that you have set, and lets the answer show you what the question must have really been.*
"And so I hope I have been wrong."
You would be better off if you were wrong (and happy). You are not coerced, but merely hope to have the thing you want.
Then you can say in perfect honesty, "I want another way to look at this."
"Now you have changed your mind about the day and have remembered what you really want. Its purpose has no longer been obscured by the insane belief you want it for the goal of being right (scary outcome/unhappy) when you are wrong (yay! the Holy Spirit's interpretation."
Go on with:
"Perhaps there is another way to look at this. What can I lose by asking?"
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*I had a hard time understanding the double question and getting an answer to the question I really want. I thought a decision was a statement not a question. But it really is an answer to a question that you've asked and forgot that you had even asked and answered, i.e. you've made a decision about someone or something.
For example, you see a brother who has a frown on his face because he just got bad news that has nothing to do with you or anyone you know. But your ego has other plans! And so you think, "Why is he looking at me that way?" (You didn't really consciously ask yourself that. Instead, you jumped to a decision about him. As soon as we asked the question, an answer came back. The ego goes right to the JJE.) The following internal dialog, also goes by quickly: "He looks angry, because of that thing that I said or did an instant or millennium years ago," (judge). "But he should have not done that thing he did to me. He's the bad one (jury)! I hate him or myself for it (executioner)." (Now that you've gotten through that routine, you feel guilty, shame, anger, depression.) You've imprisoned both of you with a false perception. And until you quietly and peacefully give it to the H.S. for His Love and forgiveness, both of you will feel the effects. Those questions and conclusions go by imperceptibly most of the time! Our bodies simply get the outcome, the feeling. And the disease unless we ask the HS to fix it.
The Course puts it this way.
"A question (decision) asked in hate (fear) cannot be answered, because it is an answer in itself." This is the double question. (See Chapter 27 section 4 , para 2 and 3 to explain this further).
So, to demonstrate right minded thinking after quickly catching myself, here you go.
Two days ago, I had eaten something that appeared to effect my whole digestive track. Instead of asking a question, "Why or What?" and making a decision in my mind, (for earlier that day I had decided that I was not going to subject myself to the ego's rantings and dismal proclamations about this body's state of being) my thought, ever so briefly, went to my "stomach and intestines". "I'm going to be sick." but then I remembered my earlier decision. So, I quickly went through Chapter 30s' Rules For Decisions. I allowed for a question and answer not of my (or the ego's) making. As I sat at my small dining table, I envisioned Jesus sitting across from me. He had a sky blue tallit (prayer veil) over his head. He reached for my hands, held them, and then reminded me, of the question I really wanted, Who am I? He went on. "This is not who you are. You are the Light of the world. You are not a body. Your body is an illusion just as those sensations (in your digestive track) are." We sat there together as I remembered my real Self. The "sensations" disappeared. I didn’t have to run to the bathroom which is my typical M.O.
I've reached out to Jesus several times since then over the last two days. He sits facing me in meditation or in my studies. As I write this, I just remembered to ask Him to sit next to me. I see Him in my imagination doing so. He's held my hand and calmed my mind as we walked through the dark cloud of illusions** and got myself back to the calm Self, the Self that remembers to "Be at peace and remember that I am God" or "Yea, though I walk through the shadow of death (and illusions), I will fear no evil, for thou art with me; thy rod and staff they comfort (guide and protect) me."
When I envision Him with me, it brings a genuine smile to my heart and face.
**Lesson 70
"Try to pass the clouds by whatever means appeals to you. If it helps you, think of me (Jesus) holding your hand and leading you. And I assure you this will be no idle fantasy."
OMG. that last line, "no idle fantasy!" Soak on that for a while!
We are a family here at your blog. We've come to this earth at a challenging time. We must remember to reach out to one another when we need a little reassurance. This process, nor living here now, is not for the faint of heart! I've seen much evidence to allow me to realize that I am protected. Perhaps it's because of the job that I must do, helping to establish the atonement. I believe that all earnest seekers at this time are also protected.
• Thank you, Sean! Many blessings and much Love to you. I am here for you, as I feel confident are all who read your posts!💞 You are a blessing to all of us!
Jeannie
Thank you for sharing, Jeannie. I'm very grateful for your clarity and hopefulness. Our shared presence is the way forward - it is the light! And I love hearing folks share their experience and strength, modeling the way forward for those of us still struggling to find the path . . . thank you Jeannie 🙏🙏
~ Sean
Sean, this is so beautifully raw and honest and a part of the confusion of many of us everywhere I suspect. Knowing the illusion and seeing the ego’s belief in separation and studying the Course in order to overcome these worldly concepts are all worthwhile for our learning and movement towards love……but where is the Grace and Love that Jesus is reminding us all resides inside, IS God, IS the Holy Spirit, IS never separate.
How do we see the oneness and beauty in others BEFORE we see it in ourselves? Before we truly convince that child still lurking inside that screams at us daily to be seen?
How do we possibly give authentically in relationships if our sense of self only comes from a place of being this perfect, kind, loving companion, striving to not feel separate because the Course teaches us we’re not?
We know the Truth, we many times feel it and live it but when that child reaches out for attention we so often deny the little one it’s due. Jesus never denied the little ones. He calls us to be like them. And what do children do? They feel their feelings in the moment without judgement or a sense of selfishness. They rightly expect their caregivers to provide for those needs and respond to those feelings.
Now, in this moment, no one else can be our caregiver. No one can make us feel enough because we are kind or loving or supportive. No one can make us feel one with the all. Not the Course, not ancient Texts, not our spouse or children or any relationship. And it’s only when that hell hole of aloneness is explored and the fears of the child inside are allowed to be truly expressed can the real Comforter be revealed. Not the ego’s version….the real Source that never abandoned you or made you feel not enough. That which dwells within every fibre.
Only then can we see that it’s true in all others and hence can’t possibly be separate. But until that realisation happens internally, in this illusionary suit we have been blessed with, we accept that Love is graciously shown through relationships in order to always point the way back to Source and we forgive ourselves with a chuckle that we forget so often.
Sorry Sean! I’m obviously talking to myself and little Lizzie. Sending us all loving pointers 💖
Loving pointers gratefully received, Liz . . . I love all of this and appreciate you sharing it. If we don't share the way with one another, we'll never find it ourselves - and I forget all the time and needs lot of help . . . thank you for being here and being a light 🙏🙏
~ Sean
Thank you as always. Xx
🙏🙏
Thank you for reminding : very insightful. You said ,’ what I truly want from you is friendship as we find our way back to our True Self in Creation only way to receive friendship from you is to give you friendship. There is no other way. ‘ Bill said to Helen- there must be another way- that is the other way- a way of moving away from egoic conflict- offer friendship- offer peace - kindness and receive friendship, peace, kindness. What one gives they receive. Thank you Sean.
You're welcome, Janice - thank you for being here and sharing. I'm very grateful 🙏🙏
~ Sean
"There is no separation anywhere. All that's missing is our acceptance of this fact." This is the clincher. Thank you again for so much inspiration and insight. SO needed right now!
You are welcome, Heidi - thanks for being here and sharing 🙏🙏
~ Sean
Thank you, Sean. Recognizing, remembering, and reminding one another of our inner child’s innocence and that we are walking together on holy ground makes kindness and companionship possible. In this way, no stray dog or person can ever stay lost for long.💕🌸
Thank you Kimberley . . . Remembering our innocence is so fundamental - and the innocence of those we hold guilty - easier said than done but also surprisingly natural . . . and yes, no more lost dogs or people, just friends walking "the way of innocence together, singing as you behold the open door of Heaven and recognize the home that called to you (T-20.II.11:3) 🙏🙏
Sean, as always, I thoroughly enjoyed reading your article and, as always, deeply appreciate your mighty companionship 💜
Thanks, Trish - hope all is well 🙏🙏
Thank you dear brother (where have you been - you have been missed!) There is no separation anywhere. Thank you for reminding me how simple salvation is. "When brothers join in purpose in the world of fear, they stand already at the edge of the real world. ²Perhaps they still look back, and think they see an idol that they want. ³Yet has their path been surely set away from idols toward reality. (ACIM, T-30.V.7:1-3)
Thank you Sean, I found your article moving and uplifting. I have been following the Course and teaching it too for many years. I love the way your lyrical writing connects us through feelings as well as intellect. Many Course teachers emphasise 'learning' but for me the emphasis is on how to live and breathe the teachings in the way we move through each day, knowing we are love and that there is no separation. Embracing our inner child's profound innocence is both essential and empowering.